Life as I knew ceased to exist when I came into recovery…
At least that’s what I thought and felt at first.
When I first started to party hard it was with my foster family who were pretty hard core Bikers.
Now they were awesome to take in a street kid like me with the issues I had.
But biker life is a suck it up and sink or swim type of life.
If you had issues you better keep them to yourself or be eaten alive.
I was never good at hiding mine so I pretty much just sank from the start.
I never even ended up with the cool biker like “Slash” or “Killer”
I usually ended up with some looser called “Tater Nut’s” that was just as grateful to have me as I was to have him.
Or worse the loud obnoxious one that everybody hated and he would take his crap out on me.
Biker life was all I ever wanted to be a success at but was a miserable failure from the start.
I always wanted to be the”Cool Chick”that everyone wanted to hang out with but just never knew how.
I lived a life of poor imitations.
As my drinking and addictions grew worse so did my reputation and I started straying further and further away from the family,convinced I could never return.
After several years away I ended up doing in-custody treatment.
Nice way to say JAIL but at least I was in the program unit and it worked.
When released I really thought I had nowhere to return to so I spent my first year feeling isolated but practicing a program of recovery in my fellowship of choice.
That’s when I rediscovered Sober Bikers.
I had known about a group long ago but had heard they had disbanded now I learned they had formed a new group and I searched out their meetings…
It was love from the first one I attended !
For the first time I felt like these were people that knew where I had come from and what I had been through and all they cared about was I no longer partook of the lifestyle they too had left behind.
What I admired most was the fact that they were still bikers in every sense of the word but yet different in so many other ways than I had ever known a biker to be.
They still road hard and fast…
They still cussed and spit.
The men still wore leather and the women wore even more….
And I felt accepted.
I began to see a new life path in front of me.
Now 4 years down the road….
I no longer have to bury my issues.
I have kindred spirits that want to help me with them.
My Sponsor is a member of a Women’s MC and asked me if I would like to Probate with her club and it took me all of 1/8 of a second to say “Hell Yeah” !
Life as I knew it is over yes, but…
A new mile marker is on the horizon for me….
Gonna get my boots outta the closet..
Gonna put back on my leather…
I never did stop cussing and spittin anyway…
Today I am Simply_Sandra and…
I am Gonna ride once again!